The doctor confirmed I have herpes less than twenty-four hours ago. I am only sixteen years old and now realize with some of the choices I have made, I might as well be twenty-five years old. Knowing that I have a STD for the rest of my life is devastating news.

I guess it could happen to anyone. But now I have to make an adult decision on how to handle this and be more careful not only for myself but also for others. I have to think about issues that never occurred to me before; ones I thought didn’t apply to me.

I always had that state of mind where “nothing could happen to me” and that I was “invincible.” Everything is changing now. Thoughts like “what do I tell my friends?”, “Do I tell anyone or keep it to myself?” and “can I live my life the way I want to live like before?” have replaced those of invincibility.

Of course at first I thought my life truly was over. But after having a discussion with my mother she stated that not everything revolves around if you can have sex or not. It truly doesn’t, it also means just because I do have herpes doesn’t mean I can’t ever have sex, just safer sex. So I can still go to high school like any other normal teenager, and go to college like any other person on this planet. As far as my friends go, I would rather keep this to myself, not because I don’t trust them, but because it’s personal matter to me and should be a subject handled with care.

Eventually I will find the right person, and when I tell them they won’t look at me any different. I learned with herpes that your life can still be just as fulfilling. From this point on, I have to keep my head up, look at the future ahead of me and not dwell on past bad decisions.